It is really that simple. God looks for a change in our hearts. Simple. Simple? I'm not so sure that is the best word to use. It should be simple: change my heart, change my life, grow closer to God. That is all I want. That is all he wants. So why is it so difficult?
I survey my life this year, this season. I am blessed with the best of friends, the kind of friends who share in laughter and in prayer. I am surrounded by a family who loves me unconditionally: sisters with overflowing talent, a mom with unyielding patience and strength, brothers with a sense of humor to lighten the darkest of situations, and a dad who is slowly revealing his confidence in me. I am challenged with what I can handle. I am given psalms to sing. I am always in good company, and am fortunate enough to have the best mentors. While I have fears and anxieties about the things I cannot change, I am blessed with the drive to confront the things I can change.
Without a doubt, as undeserving as I am, God has given me everything and has asked for very little in return. I know what he wants... my heart. But there's just something inside me. I don't really know what it is. There's something inside me that hesitates to give my heart, to give myself completely over to him. Here's where the complication lies. I want so desperately to be completely submersed in his grace. I really do. I try to imagine how amazing that life might look, how different that lifestyle might be. I get excited to think that this might be my life... if I could just give my whole heart to God.
So this season, I aim to change my heart, to give my heart, to change my life. Big plans for a not-so big girl. I'm ready for this challenge; I can't wait for this change.
Monday, February 15, 2010
Thursday, February 4, 2010
How to Be a Woman...
First and foremost, you should be beautiful... because you are beautiful. You are womanly, you are brave, and you are beautiful. You should know you are beautiful because you were made that way. You are confident. You are courageous. You are poised until you are angry, and you are beautiful.
You must respect that you are here for service. Whether that is for your own happiness, for others, or for both, you are here to employ your talents that make you happy. You were given so many talents, many that you might belittle. Don't. You are extremely brilliant and gifted, and the world cannot wait for these talents to surface. Don't apologize for your strengths. They are yours to give, to offer, and this is no fault of yours.
You are capable of love and are clever about it. You may fool some, but not others. You may be swooned or do some swooning, but either way you become flattered in the pursuit f love. Something that's always in pursuit: love. Someone will always love you, and you will always love someone or some idea. You are beautiful. You are a woman.
You are captivating. You may try to conceal your beauty as if it's a bad thing. Why? You seek recognition for your soul's beauty, and perhaps when someone is lost looking for it, you fear they may never find it. You hide. But please don't. Don't hide it from the world. It needs a woman's beauty. You are a woman. Your beauty defines you. Embrace this. You are and always will be beautiful. You can change so much with that beauty.
You are a woman; you don't act like one. It's a state of being, of feeling. You are beautiful. You are captivating. You are a woman.
You must respect that you are here for service. Whether that is for your own happiness, for others, or for both, you are here to employ your talents that make you happy. You were given so many talents, many that you might belittle. Don't. You are extremely brilliant and gifted, and the world cannot wait for these talents to surface. Don't apologize for your strengths. They are yours to give, to offer, and this is no fault of yours.
You are capable of love and are clever about it. You may fool some, but not others. You may be swooned or do some swooning, but either way you become flattered in the pursuit f love. Something that's always in pursuit: love. Someone will always love you, and you will always love someone or some idea. You are beautiful. You are a woman.
You are captivating. You may try to conceal your beauty as if it's a bad thing. Why? You seek recognition for your soul's beauty, and perhaps when someone is lost looking for it, you fear they may never find it. You hide. But please don't. Don't hide it from the world. It needs a woman's beauty. You are a woman. Your beauty defines you. Embrace this. You are and always will be beautiful. You can change so much with that beauty.
You are a woman; you don't act like one. It's a state of being, of feeling. You are beautiful. You are captivating. You are a woman.
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