My Music

Music is the silence in which I speak my heart

My mind, my thoughts fluid in time

For silence is the only place I'm free from the noise

And music, my silence, belongs to me

I fear destruction in the noise, the kind that cuts the tying thread

But in myself, in my silence, my music

I am at one with me, my heart, my mind, my body, my being, my faith, my God, in solidarity

My music is my praise, my truth and listening ear

My melody my promise.

My music is my silence in which my heart speaks

and the world hears

meant to be free

I wanna hold your waves

As they roll into my feet

They rush in and back out

and escape my reach

You're always here

Yet I can't meet you

I am unable to time

Your stream

As I tire in your tide

All I want is to keep you

Still with me for always

But to hold you here

From ebb and flow

You'd lose your rhythm

A stagnant pool of harbored dreams

Maybe I can't have you

You're meant to be free.

not sure what to title

I've made up my mind.

I release my grip from you

and drain your venom of paralysis 

that numbed my thoughts for so long.

And don't come back

Expecting a reservation

For the heart you once stole

You trained it into emptiness 

But now the vacancy is full

My mind's full of thoughts

My heart full of him

I hear myself and the world

And you couldn't listen

Listen. Can you hear me laugh?

or Remember the sound of my kiss?

Your venom's simple remedy: I walk away

Your silence that was my torture 

is now my bliss.

Desperation

I don't care what you call me

As long as I'm the only one you call.

Take those shades off from your eyes 

and see me, but no one else at all.

Strip the paper from your thoughts

The net holding your mouth dry.

I don't care what you call me

But when you don't I wonder why.

And it pains to wait for your heart to voice

A memory of me in a word.

And I pray as I wait for untainted breath

to sound my name unheard.

I don't care what you call me.

Just that you call me.

A breath, a whisper, a cry

I don't care what you call me

Just so you call me.

And not to say good-bye.

Drops of Crimson

Drops of crimson
from the crown fade
onto the lace of my tears
out of mercy for me

Confused in contemplation
I cry and am stained
by the crimson from a stripped rose
as it blushes my cheek.

Who am I that you bow so I may stand?
When all I can do right now is fall?
Your mercy entwined in the lace that adorns my skin
Who am I at all?

The way life works out

That's the way life works out
breathe in now and stand straight
you lean to the left with that extra weight
and you're tired

So you walk away
Stronger on your left
or stronger because you left
That poisonous vial made you weak
But it made you look right.

Over your shoulder you see those eyes
Who lust for your strength and safety
That face
who mists in exhaustion
and wants to be carried home.

But life's got other plans.
It's not yet eleven, and your limbs slave to the scent of iron,
which some say smells like sunscreen.
Give me 35 because I don't want
that smell to stain my scars from the pump

Soon enough I can retire
to my evening at home
where I breathe in again
and lean to my left
While what's right for me
somewhere out there roams.

Rifles for Roses

"The time has come to exchange those rifles for roses." -Betancourt, COLOMBIA

Rifles for roses
a bloom for a gun
safety in something beautiful
violence undone.

Both slender and smart
Powerful in passive care
But only the delicate slip of the rose
Commends a pristine air.

So why did it take this long
to trade violence for art?
As vendors for peace
on the world, a rose, we impart

It buds as it smiles
to an audience of rays
And as it feeds from its creator's tears
Its lover redeems its praise.

Life found itself from hiding
Guided by prisms on the bud
And the absence of a rose's harm
saves a people from cruel blood.

No one can uproot this feeling
the trade from war to love
and mutual respect for human dignity
and for life all else above.

Without "U"

without u there would be no us,
but we would be two and alone
without u no clouds nor sky-blue
would the world ever know
instead, it'd frown as the sun would never have shone.
There would be desire but no understanding
faith, but no soul
love, but not unconditionally
la Luna taken from it's role
law but no justice
peace but no truth
I can't even picture myself living
in a world without u.

no woman no cry

No woman no cry,
why?
There is comfort in my tears
and I do not cry alone.

Should I laugh instead?
Do I attempt to mock myself
whose tears spoil the art of concealing;
it's an addiction really, an artist solely in vain.
But pride feeds vanity and
we all know that lifeline is too essential.

No woman no cry,
Why?
Is this supposed to make me feel loved?
Or am I stripped of natural moist
thinning the vanity off my face
and cleansing the eyes of a country blind.

No woman no cry
If I don't, who will?
Who will risk pride for prejudice?
This is my medium of justice
Armed with empathy alone
I will fight with my fears
Thinned of my vanity and stripped of my pride
How can they tell me, "No woman no cry?"

the graham's a tease

Awake in the dusk of noon.
I run down the grahams to the tide
They don't crumble under my feet
nor the veneered white of the water
as they often do in my mouth.

Wishing that shooting star
could point us home
Wading through shadows and vendors of art
Now dissipated, we're alone

And we talk about friendship,
and of nothing full to the brim
of bikes and wood and awkwardness
but not really about him.

He says we're well acquainted
and i laugh at his heavy breath
Waiting for thoughts to spill out
of things I haven't heard yet.

And he says he doesn't know me,
and in fear I agree.
But I know him and admire him
for the man he is and wants to be.

I guess I'm like the tide
A constant friend in tow and haste
But perhaps I'll tire for the graham's a tease
and it seems I'll never get a taste.

Missed right field's glance
left as a stare.
On the steps I ran
with strides of nowhere.

I couldn't bear it without you.
It would've been such a dare,
And I couldn't stand to their sitting eyes
Slowly darting from everywhere.

I guess with this fate, by chance, left in my control
As your contempt, my dress did tear.
But in plight of all offered
Your absence, still there
My tender heart coarsed bear.

If I could escape this cage
I would.
Believe me, I would break free.
But what I would do
outside of this cage
is beyond me.

Dreaming without reason
or dreaming as a wish
is appetizing for a short while

but then...

Think of you

Think of me
on your drive home
when the radio plays our song.
So I can hear you hum in harmony.
I've waited for you so long.

Think of me
when you walk in
and our sweet song strides
with each pace of your return.
You belong here,
and I belong to you.

Think of me
when you think love
of happiness and all that's true.
Because not a moment goes by
That I don't think of you.

Love in Active Still Life

I want to remember the way you love me
A photograph of your half crescent smile
Ingrained in my lips
When I traced yours with my soft caress.
I take note of the sun's paint.
You tell me you were born with them,
And I'm mesmerized by those spots
but they disappear with age.
And in complete focus I capture your eyes.
Those eyes who said "I love you"
and forever shared the depths of your soul
Hold still, I want to get it right.
Those deep impassioned outlets of beauty
They are striking and yet modest.
And tempting... they've tempted my heart
to ache for a peak
into your world within.
And you look as you speak to me,
through parted lips
Whose contours I can recall on mine.
And I feel your heart
gaze into my eyes.
Are you trying to do the same?

Graffiti

Graffiti from your eyes
tells the story of war,
as the paint spills out
onto broken hardwood floor.

I can't get past
what you once called art.
What really was some one's attempt
to cover up your heart.

You say it made you beautiful,
but the colors rot the wood.
And your blank stare that's left behind
whispers dreams it never could.

So cry out every last drop,
every hue.
And as I fall into your eyes,
I see their true color, blue.

French side sitting
it's wide-eyed and grinning
I'm hopelessly pinning
my heart to yours.

Lame duck receding
the pacifist's greeting
I'm at war again
over you.

Look the other way
I'm changing my stare
The cloud moves out of sight
But the sky's never bare

I look to your heart
this time through thickened glass doors
you say I look alright
as I pin mine to yours.

a bit angsty...

One whisper of regret
will not make me cry
You've taken my heart
and tossed me aside

I had memorized your every wish
Your dreams I shared as my own
I guess courage via my eyes
drained when your love to me shown

How could I write a letter to you?
My pen dried up with shattered words,
and the ink like a poison I intended to drink.
How could I call?
With my throat choking on naivete.
It's getting so hot I can't breathe
and the words hang on my tongue
in fear of what you've already done.
And I couldn't stop by
as my heart races
though my legs can't move
and my feet can't seem to tell right from left

Although I want to tell you how you've ruined everything.

And that sweet whisper of regret
as you climb up to my tower
on the long hair I grew for you
is enough to make me forget
how I pained in your absence
and passed in your leaving.
And like a stranger you stole from me
not thinking twice.
You took my heart when you walked out in the rain.

And your whisper, like the drops,
stay with me each day.
I live and breathe in your medium of pain.

Silence, as it stops
the quiet absence of small patter
I need that cleansing, that water
Even as it falls from my eyes.

But I don't need you.

I will meet you on the docks
And we'll stay up all night.
Dancing with the waves
Dipping our toes to feel the cool warmth of summer.

And you should bring our stones
So we can toss them into the unknown,
Without the fear of losing our love
Without a care in the world.

Together King and Queen of no place else
We'll rule the moonlight
And just be ourselves.
Laughing, playing, dancing,
This dock is our kingdom for the night.

But if you say midnight's too late
and we weren't meant to rule the sea,
My heart would sink into the deep
My youth the seagrass consuming.

But you promise to me
That you'll never leave,
But you'll dance with me instead.
And so all night, on the docks
Your arms will be my bed.

I feel your fragrance clothe my heart
Your sweet royal stare caresses my face
I feel my heart sink into your truth
I love you as you are.

I sometimes wish you knew my thoughts
That I could tell you how I feel
But maybe your blue eyes already know
When our gazes met,
My heart you seal.

You set me upon yours.
Two hearts like one wave.
Crashing into each other's embrace
Feeling the open warmth of the sun.

That ocean floor we ride along
is bound to have it's grooves.
But hold me tight
and hold me strong
and nothing will drown our fuse.

I love you and can't wait to complete you.

I want to astonish the world
-but in your name
I promise you my love
for all sinners the same

I want to drape your radiance
in gowns of lace
to feed the famished
to bring a smile to one face

If I am clothed in your word
I will give warmth to the naked
When I speak of your love so strong
Fears I will blanket

I want to cradle the unloved
With your sweet songs of embrace
The melodies of your love
Create a sacred space

And as for your peace...
make me your dove,
with olive branch in hand
as an expression of your love.

Help me invite people to dance and pray
to invite their passions
Help me teach them to pray

And all the while
You know me best
and you know what it is
My heart truly requests

Help me to love you
the way you love me
Help me defend you, and fight for you
and live for you
I pray that I can serve you.

Beautiful

I think it's time to change,
but not the kind I can do alone.
I could cut my hair and change my face,
but that wouldn't satisfy my thirst for his grace.
I need to change.

God show me your waters
and give me your grace
I'll add some shine
with each sip of your wine
and I'll be beautiful in your eyes.

I'm done with my heartache
I can handle my fears.
I've been blessed with a miracle
Who's dried all my tears.
Now I am beautiful.

Now you see me smile.
Now you hear me sing.
I finally found that makeup
That my heart was missing.

God gave me his water
to pour on my face.
I added some shine,
with a taste of his wine,
and I'm beautiful now in his eyes.
I'm beautiful now in my eyes.
I'm beautiful to God for all time.

I'll give you my voice

If I only had the words
to change the world's fear,
to comfort the dying,
and make mysteries clear.
If I only knew how to pursue life's promising peace.

But I don't know how to speak, what to say
For who, among men, might listen to me
Who could live the words I feel?
So pick me up, Lord, and write me your song.

So let our anthem be forever heard,
I'll give you my voice, if your give me the words
I'll give you my voice, if you write me the words
I'll give you me voice, if you show me your words.

Catching Your Rain

Like catching the rain
my dreams are so out of reach.
Out of touch with you,
I'm lost.

I am small as the drops,
insignificant alone.
But in your eyes
I make the tide go.

Help me find your love
in sunshine and in rain.
It's always so simple to feel your rays.
But it's in the storms that I need you most
I've got to catch your rain.